PRIORITIES!

well- i was sitting at my kitchen table eating breakfast having a conversation with myself and i think i figured this out a long time ago- the reason why i haven't managed to move from this state yet falls COMPLETELY on the ridiculous excuse of "support" my grandma ASSUMED would advocate for me to help me. now.. it's just about making my stupid, selfish, no-good bum of a mom comfortable with how much of a fucking unaccomplished loser she is. my stupid family members assume that i'll take the easy route in life and just go to courage kenny and collect social security my whole life because it worked for my mom! that shit won't pay for everything i need in life and THEY KNOW IT- not in this economy anyway. *gasp* THEY JUST DON'T CARE! they also refuse to acknowledge that my mom had A LOT MORE support than i do. MY PARENTS DON'T OWN AN APARTMENT WHICH THEY HOUSE ME IN FREE AND TAKE CARE OF MY KIDS BECAUSE I'M TOO STUPID TO. that's what i get for having selfish, unempathetic (so that means they also lack intelligence) excuse of family members. i know damn well amanda and my other family members wouldn't be satisfied with being limited to hauling their asses to courage kenny and collecting SSI when they've worked a few jobs and attended college. courage kenny DOESN'T CARE ABOUT THEIR CLIENT'S PROGRESS. THEY JUST CARE ABOUT APPEARING AS IF THEY DO. (reason why kevin- MY PHYSICAL THERAPIST AT COURAGE KENNY always used to use the excuse of "liability" with me when not letting me do things independently) they try to limit and discourage their clients (WHO LACK ADVOCACY) from progressing and becoming independent, so they don't have to depend on the sorry excuse of care they get. it may seem like a great thing but being vulnerable and having everyone think you CAN'T do everything is NOT cute.. or even smart. i have a video interview a little later with walzer. i'm also pretty sure that my mom is frustrated to READ EVERYTHING i've managed to do WITH a brain injury that she never was able to do since she let everyone assume she couldn't read and was slow. my family cares about me as much as to NOT encourage my goals (except for joe) just so they can look good and to keep my sorry selfish excuse of a mother happy. about the ONLY thing my mom has given me is ptsd.. OH! I FORGOT! I ALSO LOOK LIKE A VOODOO DOLL ALL SEWED UP FROM THE INCISIONS I HAD TO HAVE ON ACCOUNT OF HER SELFISH ASS HOLDING ME IN FRONT OF HER TO BLOCK MY DAD'S FOOT FROM KICKING HER! MOTHER OF THE CENTURY! *CLAPS* if jessiy thinks i'll take care of my mom's selfish ass so she doesn't get sent to a nursing home- SHE HAS ANOTHER THING COMING. what about fat amy? mom can just act like another one of her fifty kids! IT ALL WORKS OUT! plus- you and i both know that my mom would've NEVER willingly taken care of me if my grandma wasn't alive to make her. probably the reason why i no longer go and see my mom every other weekend like i did when my grandma was alive. i see no reason to. she clearly doesn't care about me- she can't even make sure i have everything i need on the weekends when i do go to her house because she's too BUSY AT THE BAR, PLAYING POOL. PRIORITIES!